Twice is NOT so nice!

As soon as I get my heart set on writing and organizing and whatever else, my body decides it has other plans.  Another TIA on Feb. 12th, 2016.  Yes, that is 2 times in 3 months, that was my reaction as well.

This time the damage increased slightly; decreased movement in both legs, and I am currently using a walker to regain strength of my legs, with the right leg having more mobility problems that the other!

Using a walker; a humbling experience.  The ability to walk, on my own, completely unassisted, is the goal!  The week before, so much stress.  Stress I do not even wish to discuss; but that lead me to the overwhelming feelings of anxiety and stress.  I cannot blame my brain, it has been on overload.

We know that stress can have the capacity to bring on another episode, so why stress, right?  Not so easy on this roller coaster called, life.  We are hanging in there, and the kids are doing a fantastic job stepping up and doing what is necessary to help me.  Another humbling, or should I say humiliating time in my life.  Dependent upon my teen boys to help me relearn what I have lost, take care of my daily needs, and keep a positive attitude so that our precious little Lizzy, does not fully comprehend how stressful it really is on the rest of us.

We are doing it!  With the help of some of the best friends a girl can ask for; and the prayers of the community and my friends, it is the best feeling in the world.  It gives me a sense of peace that people are fighting for me, even some I do not know.

Wherever this disease takes me, I do know that I will not be alone, even when I feel hundreds of miles away from everyone!  Mentally, physically, and emotionally, away from everyone.  Just part of the process; dealing with cancer, it's reality.

Well, off to finish the forms that will direct everyone in what to do with me, if I am unable to speak for myself.  A very prayerful time of discernment.  To some it seems morbid, to me, it is a part of the acceptance process.  Live like you are dying, but also live like you are alive!  You have to mesh the two, especially when you leave a legacy behind.